Tuesday, December 31, 2013

Abandoned Blogs

Disclaimer: this is going to be a raw, first draft blog. Corrections are welcomed in the comment section. Perhaps there are people out there that actually read my blog.    ;)

Tomorrow will be the last day of 2013. I have thought about blogging for the last couple of days. Yesterday I was going over the labels for my blog to see if there have been any patterns over the last 9 plus years. (today is 10 days short of 10 years.) better part of 10 years. I am a terrible labeler...I have to be, there is enough content to have some patterns. Without even reading through my blog, I know that I have written a fair share about parenting, books and parenting education. The labels with the most content: life (12), love (11), friendship and forgiveness (each with 7). It is strange to not be good with the labels because I am a compulsive list maker. (You know the kind of person who will write something on the list just to check it off because it wasn't there when the list was originally penned. That is just one of my qualifiers. ;)  For at least 2 years I have considered abandoning this blog and the 10 year mark sounds like a good place to end this blog and start another one.

Picking up where I left off yesterday. NOW the count down begins to 2014. I thought of making this post about lists. Then I started to check out what other people on the internet had written about lists. (Yes, I know that the proper verb for that is now, "googled." I just didn't want to use it in a sentence and I ended up doing it anyway.) There are a number of blogs out there that have been abandoned (and that number is in the millions) and now, I am strongly leaning toward moving on from this one. So although I will say good day from here, I will say hello here on January 8th, 2014.

There is so much to choose from...Dan's first 4 months after turning 50, Scotland, London - reunion with my cousin Tess, NOT an empty nest-just more room to spread out, lists, abandoned blogs, What does it mean to be a part of the body of Christ?, ACA, etc. There is a lot that I could write about: the top 10 reasons 2013 was a good year I am grateful for a computer to muse upon, fingers to type, a brain to think and process, a heart to feel, strength in my body to move, work and play. Yes, I am stalling. And I want to end with a smile.....it is hard to say good-bye.

How about a confession?
For years I was one of those people who wrote a Christmas brag letter, sometimes it included a picture and sometimes it didn't sometimes I mailed it in time for Christmas and other times for St. Patrick's Day (yeah, that is a real holiday - we are Irish!) and I think I even did a summertime mailing but looking back on the early years, I probably felt that I had something to prove. When you send your kids to school, you are not asked questions about your children's education because to send your kids is the norm. Fortunately, I was aware of this fact, so the preparation for defense sometimes came out in the form of "the Christmas letter." I never thought that we would educate our own children. It was an alternative that was available and like most human beings I like to have choices. So Dan and I did our "homework"and made an informed decision.
I don't think that I ever wrote the "a day in the life of the Mullaneys" that said, "Our kids are all old enough to know where we live, we're at the library and they are asking me for our address for the third time because we just moved again for the third time this year." Or "Michael went for a walk to the beach and came home in a cruiser." Or  "Dan broke his other foot." Or "We've made 4 good offers on houses in the last 3 years and all the deals fell through." Nope people don't write about the truth except those people who laugh at themselves. So I think I stopped writing them when I got a hold of myself and started laughing at myself and my life. At times there has been pain, grief and heartache and we usually cover those things in love and share with those who are close to us and will pray with us. I have probably written about some of those things on my blog and probably posted a strip from the funnies too! Oh, well.....some people wanted the news about our family and some could probably care less. (Not that they didn't care they just cared less than those who really wanted the news.) Christmas is Good News for those who believe! So it makes sense that people write about the good that happens in their families. The truth is there is enough bad news coming to us 24/7 that we can always use a piece of good news.

It wasn't really hard to go cold turkey on the Christmas Brag Letter because the truth is in the midst of struggles, pain and growing up, we are still proud of our kids and it is a pleasure for me to know without letting the world know about it. I guess the brag letter may have taught them the meaning of the old proverb, "Let another praise you and not your own lips." And when parents have healthy boundaries with their kids then they recognize these people whom they have the pleasure and responsibility of raising are not possessions but dear loved ones then we are free to praise them for life well lived while they are still living! I believe our kids no matter how old they are want and need our loving support.
I have probably said it before but birthing adults is painful process. Letting go of certain ways we relate to our kids when we don't even realize it is difficult. May I say that I am grateful for my adult children being willing to bring it to my attention. It is another season of growing and believing that letting go is another way to love. (It was great to have Grace & Austin, Katie and Michael here for Christmas. Spending time with them was indeed the best present for me this year.)
Some of our friends still send out the Christmas Letter and I gratefully read each one, rejoicing over friends both near and far. Who knows maybe next year, I will reach out with a letter full of Good News but for now, I will do my best to keep it real in the coming year on my new blog, Disarmed by Love.
Happy New Year....let's make it a good one without any fear.