There is no writer's block here or a cat getting my tongue, just a really strange time in the life of this pilgrim and her family. Today I called a friend just to check in and say hi. She said, "Where are you living?" I said "Marlborough" and she said, "You haven't been letting us know where you are on your blog." I apologized.

Unless you have been in direct contact with me, you have probably wondered where it is that we have gone. As I have said to more than a few people, I quit moving two moves ago. Now I find myself back in Marlborough. I must say that I do like the city where I watched our three children grow, change and become accustom to things and then in 2003 set off on a journey that has brought us back to where we started from. (if you want my new street address email me)

Not sure where we are going, but I am certainly looking forward to all that is to come. Grace going off to college, Katie touring with CFC (ICC) and Michael presently working with Dan and me as we help out at Endicott (Dan's brother Billy's store).....we will see what the fall brings for the 3 of us. There are things that I do want to plan for but without landing, those decisions have to be put on hold.

Here is to living life on the fly. Now writing from Marlborough, MA.

A trip to the Library yielded the following titles:

Do what you are : discover the perfect career for you through the secrets of personality type / Paul D. Tieger and Barbara Barron-Tieger.

What do I do now? : Dr. Foster's 30 laws of great decision making / Charles Foster.

Reading people : how to understand people and predict their behavior-- anytime, anyplace / Jo-Ellan Dimitrius and Mark Mazzarella.

Questions and Comments welcome.

^{From the 5th chapter of the book of Galatians
out of The New Testament}

¹³For you were called to freedom, brothers. Only do not use your freedom as an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another. ¹⁴For the whole law is fulfilled in one word:"You shall love your neighbor as yourself." ¹⁵But if you^AC)"> bite and devour one another, watch out that you are not consumed by one another.
¹⁶But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. ¹⁷For^AF)"> the desires of the flesh are against the Spirit, and the desires of the Spirit are against the flesh, for these are opposed to each other,to keep you from doing the things you want to do. ¹⁸But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the law. ¹⁹Now^AJ)"> the works of the flesh are evident: sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, ²⁰idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, rivalries, dissensions, divisions, ²¹envy, drunkenness, orgies, and things like these. I warn you, as I warned you before, that those who do such things will not inherit the kingdom of God. ²²But the fruit of the Spirit is^AN)"> love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, ²³gentleness,^AQ)"> self-control;^AR)"> against such things there is no law. ²⁴And those who belong to Christ Jesus^AS)"> have crucified the flesh with its^AT)"> passions and desires.

²⁵If we live by the Spirit, let us also walk by the Spirit. ²⁶ Let us not become conceited, provoking one another, envying one another.

Lately, I have been meditating on this part of the chapter and the italicized is mine. These are the key phrases I have been highlighting in my mind during meditation. The Word of God never grows old.

Wanting to post and looking forward to some more writing as we have a little breather before going to the National Championship Tournament and also enjoying some time attending to the boxes.

How Deep The Father's Love For Us

Stuart Townend

How deep the Father's love for us, How vast beyond all measure That He should give His only Son To make a wretch His treasure How great the pain of searing loss, The Father turns His face away As wounds which mar the chosen One, Bring many sons to glory Behold the Man upon a cross, My sin upon His shoulders Ashamed I hear my mocing voice, Call out among the scoffers It was my sin that helf Him there Until it was accomplished His dying breath has brought me life I knoww that it is finished I will not boast in anything No gifts, no power, no wisdom But I will boast inJesus Christ His death and resurrection Why should I gain from His reward? I cannot give an answer But this I know with all my heart His wounds have paid my ransom Christ is Risen!!!

A piece of Oh the Places you go!
by Dr. Suess

On and on you will hike.
And I know you'll hike far
and face up to your problems
whatever they are.

You'll get mixed up, of course,
as you already know.
You'll get mixed up
with many strange birds as you go.
So be sure when you step.
Step with care and great tact
and remember that Life's
A Great Balancing Act.
Just never forget to be dexterous and deft.
And never mix up your right foot with your left.

And wil you succeed?
Yes! You will, indeed!
(98 and 3/4 percent guaranteed.)

KID, YOU'LL MOVE MOUNTAINS!

So.....
be your name Buxbaum or Bixby or Bray
or Mordecai Ali Van Allen O'Shea,
you're off to Great Places!
Today is your day!
Your mountain is waiting.
So...get on your way!

Anyone who might be tempted to say, "Great stuff praying for money. Guess I'll stop working and pray" - don't bother even joking about it! Just remember that we prayed for only enough for food and shelter and the bare necessities of life, and our "working hours" were not according to any "union rules"! It hasn't been, nor is it, a life of any kind of "ease", but it has been tremendously exciting to see the reality of communication with God, and to see the reality of His replies, His answers, in the realm of material things, and in the realm of the minds and hearts of human beings.

L'abri by Edith Schaeffer

I have decided that life is the biggest adventure even if you remain at the same address most of your life or you never have a place to call your own.

When your troubles make you hopeless in the daylight
The darkness of night is a welcome guest.
Everyone experiences afflictions and those who say they don't can hardly be human. The more I let people in and they let me in, the more likely we will find ourselves with burdens, wounds and the like. These afflictions are accompanied by joys, laughter, and friendship.

Beliefs with Benefits

"What people who are saved, but who don't feel saved, need to know is that their salvation does not depend upon how they feel but upon what Christ has done for them. What Christ has done is summarized in the thirty-sixth question of the (Westminster) Shorter Catechism. the assurance of our salvation, the love of God, and our progress in the Christian life are depicted as the fruit of God's work on our behalf. We must look outside of ourselves to what Christ has done to rest assured in these benefits." Dr. Kim Riddlebarger

After reading this article "Basking in the Benefits" where the above paragraph is from, I couldn't help but think about how important it is to know what we believe and why we believe it. The American Church is so diverse, you could shop for a church for weeks, months and years and not find one that suits you, if you did not set a criterion for which you will even consider becoming a part of a local body of believing Christians, never mind shopping for one.
The article goes on to say,

"This particular question and its answer reminds us of the precious truth that the work of Jesus Christ is the ground of our assurance, the proof of God's love for us, and the sure sign that God intends to finish that good work that He has already begun in us. (Phil 1;6)"

We are the sheep of the Good Shepherd and it some ways we are stupid, trust our feelings instead of the Truth and we need to be reminded. C.S. Lewis has written in one of his books that it is not so much that we need to be taught as it is we need to be reminded. Reminded that it is Jesus Christ who justifies, adopts and sanctifies. That as His child, I am dearly loved. Obedience brings freedom to live by the Spirit and the list could go on.
These days I am in search of the truth about God, His Word, The Gospel, and Jesus Christ, fully God and fully man, what people are for and what God would have me do as I near the end of the race called parenthood. I am thirsty for His Grace and I want to know the truth, so that I can make headway in one of the most if not the most important endeavor in this life and that is to love my fellow man. Knowing what I believe about God and Man, may be the avenue in which the Love of God can flow through me and spill out on to my fellow human beings. It takes effort on my part but I am totally dependent on God. The results are in His Hands not mine.
So my devotional this morning is a urging me to remember that "The benefits which in this life do accompany or flow from justification, adoption, and sanctification, are, assurance of God's love, peace of conscience, joy in the Holy Ghost, increase of grace, and perseverance therein to the end." (answer to the Q36.) We can run and not grow weary as long as I am dependent on God and not on myself and my feelings.
I guess I am just a realist who doesn't believe in feel good Christianity that may try to tell me that if I am not feeling good then perhaps I am not a child of the living God. Life does not always feel good. Sometimes you find yourself riding the subway and it feels like you will never get off or see the light of day again, but being in good company, enjoying the ride anyway and knowing that yes, the train will let you off without paying another fair and soon you will feel the wind at your back.

Opening Your Heart not Just your Home
An Introduction

Heart, n.

• 2. the central, innermost, or vital part: Oxford Dictionary
• 4. The seat of the affections and passions, as of love, joy, grief, enmity, courage, pleasure &c. Noah Webster 1828
  

Hospitality, n.

• the friendly and generous treatment of guests or strangers. Oxford Dictionary

• The act or practice of receiving and entertaining strangers or guests without reward, or with kind and generous liberality. Noah Webster 1828

When I hear that someone really knows how to practice hospitality, I immediately think, that person knows how to make someone feel right at home. It is not just greeting someone with a smile but an atmosphere that embraces and welcomes you. It requires an open heart not just an open home.
The better part of the last six years, folks as far north as Quechee, Vermont and as far south as Naples, Florida, as far west as Houston, TX and a lot of places in between have opened not just their homes to us but their hearts. My older daughter, Grace has enjoyed it even wider and farther than that. It is my desire for our family to have a place of our own where we can practice that type of hospitality.

As a young wife and mother, I had a lot of fear about having anyone over. With a lot of encouragement and support from my husband, I walked through the fear again and again and again. There really is no way around it. I really had two choices: live in fear or grow through it. I am so grateful that I chose the later. Not only did I grow through it, I learned to love it!!! Friends have been made, relationships strengthen and needs have been met.

Things are strange at the moment. There are lots of unknowns but one thing I do know, that hospitality is a mindset. It is not something that you just do, but a way of life. First I learned to practice hospitality, then I learned to receive hospitality, now I am thinking about living a life of hospitality.

I can't really say, I know exactly what living a life of hospitality is, although while Grace was in Holland last summer at L'abri I read Edith Schaeffer's book L'abri Fellowship and I would say that the Schaeffers and those that have picked up the work where they left off do indeed intentionally live a life of hospitality.

I have been reading a book by Susan Schaeffer Macaulay (Edith's daughter) called For the Family's Sake, The Value of Home In Everyone's Life and the message is clear, people matter and that is why hospitality matters. The book is inspiring me. The whole feel and attitude of the book is so inviting as if Susan is saying across the miles, "come sit down with me, have some tea and let's visit." That is what I want to be like. I do believe that Susan and her husband Ranald have been living and continue to live the life of Hospitality.

Our children are The Change
Today while watching our new president being sworn into office and giving his inaugural address, I thought about the campaign theme of Change Can Happen. Change.gov was the name of the website for now President Obama's transition project. Today's speech spelled it out a little bit more:

On this day, we gather because we have chosen hope over fear, unity of purpose over conflict and discord.

On this day, we come to proclaim an end to the petty grievances and false promises, the recriminations and worn-out dogmas, that for far too long have strangled our politics.

We remain a young nation, but in the words of Scripture, the time has come to set aside childish things. The time has come to reaffirm our enduring spirit; to choose our better history; to carry forward that precious gift, that noble idea, passed on from generation to generation: the God-given promise that all are equal, all are free, and all deserve a chance to pursue their full measure of happiness.

In reaffirming the greatness of our nation, we understand that greatness is never a given. It must be earned. Our journey has never been one of short-cuts or settling for less. It has not been the path for the faint-hearted — for those who prefer leisure over work, or seek only the pleasures of riches and fame. Rather, it has been the risk takers, the doers, the makers of things — some celebrated but more often men and women obscure in their labor, who have carried us up the long, rugged path towards prosperity and freedom.

I believe it begins with individuals who have had a change of heart within families within community. We can not be a part of the we, if we as individual people have yet hope, unity of purpose, let go of resentment, grow up, stand up for others and lay down our lives, be the go getters and for us as Christians salt out of the salt shaker. I am resolved to be content at being an obscure laborer who is willing to see my children go further and higher. At the same time be willing to press on and see how far I can make it in the journey, do my best to never give up.

So that leads me to my children (K-Mac was the only commenter who wanted to hear about the children being gone) who have been gone for over a week and the oldest having been gone since the end of December. First, let's remember that they are young adults (almost 16, 17, and 19) and each of them wants to make a difference in the world. Until today, it hasn't been too quiet around here.

(did not finish this post after starting)

Back to the my children that are growing up so quickly before my eyes. There is a song by Jon Forman "C'mon, C'mon" and there is a line that says, "let's not be our parents." It is my desire that my children will go up further and higher than their dad and me. Each one will make an impact in their community and be a part of the change in this country by changing and growing more and more into the likeness of Christ. I am not specifically talking about the political landscape or policy making, although I will not count those out. However, I hope and pray for them to each influence the culture for the glory of God.

In the time that my kids were gone. I prayed for them and some of you may be surprised, that I did not pine after them even though I missed them. This is a strategic time in their lives as we "shoot out these arrows of ours" (as Gregg Harris likes to put it). Each of them have been through test launches and they are looking good and continue to prepared for their final launches. Not exactly sure when that will be for each of them but we know that is closer than we think.

Relationships with our children change as they grow up. When we resist the change the pain is greater. I have delighted in walking through life with them all through their childhood. In some ways people may think that the parents who educated their children at home have a harder time letting go, but I am doing what I have done through the years, embraced the change because it will help me to continue on my own journey in this life. By no means am I doing it with ease. I fumble, fall on my face but I get up again, often with one of my young adults helping me brush myself off and telling me, "it's ok mum."

So I want my kids to sing it out:

So c'mon, c'mon, c'mon!
Let's not be our parents.
Well c'mon, c'mon, c'mon!
Let's follow this through.
Oh c'mon, c'mon, c'mon!
Everything's waiting.
We will rise with the wings of the dawn,
When everything's new.
Everything's new.

That they would not just do better than us but that they will be better than us. To Grace, Katie and Michael I say stand on my shoulders.

blog followers

There are so many things that I want to write about listening, aging, kids test flying out of the nest (2 weeks with all 3 teenagers gone) and not letting the nest get cold, hospitality, families, death, dying and forgiveness for a start. With such a list in my head and on my heart what happens is I don't write at all.
I am very aware of the fact that I have a number of regular readers and 2 regular readers who comment. So this is a shout out to all of my regular readers. First of all THANK YOU for reading and encouraging me over the years. I enjoy getting feedback. All writers want to be read. I write because I love to do it. Today I am asking for more comments: please pick one of the subjects from the list above for me to write about next.
Again, thanks so much for reading!

In light of what is about to take place in these United States:

"Everyone thinks of changing the world, no one thinks of changing himself."
Leo Tolstoy

"All they wanted was one last great adventure."
Kenny, the grandson of my dear friend asked what the sign was, so I told him what it said. It hangs on the wall entering our kitchen. His Bebe said it was appropriate for our family. And yes, I thought to myself. I want the adventure of staying put, not having a favorite type of moving boxes, getting everything out of storage, etc. I could go on with quite a list but I think you get the picture.
Then I googled to find out who the quote was from since two people had asked in the last 3 days and I was unsuccessful in my search. I did however come across some other interesting things as a result. Here are a few:

'Running From Safety: An Adventure of the Spirit,' 1994. Daisy is Richard's Cessna 337

" Life is either a daring adventure or nothing at all. "
Helen Keller

" People travel to wonder at the height of mountains, at the huge waves of the sea, at the long courses of the rivers, at the vast compass of the ocean, at the circular motion of the stars; and they pass by themselves without wondering. "
St. Augustine

" Life is NOT a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well-preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming -- ’WOW, what a ride!!! "
Anonymous

" To die will be an awfully big adventure. "
James Matthew Barrie

[There were many more but I will spare you.]

The last quote here from the beloved JM Barrie got me to thinking. That it IS death that will be THE last great adventure. The biggest part of it being, its not an "if" but merely "when." In God's economy we are not the ones to determine that factor, but we are to be prepared. The "being prepared" part can mean different things to different people.
So many thoughts have been flowing through my mind this very morning. And thinking on the terms of being prepared for the end, the final curtain call, our final change of address, the following questions come to my mind:
"is your own house in order?"
"am I doing my best to live at peace with all men?"
"are my actions lining up with my convictions?"

I realize that there are many more questions to ask ourselves and thoughts that help us to be prepared. The thing that is comforting about death is that it is 100%. Not one of us (human beings) gets out of this life alive. It is something we all have to face and it is one of the hardest things for us to help others with facing. Lots of folks are not afraid of death but dying. I believe that I am going to need to read and write further on this subject. It has been on my mind for a totally different reason (no, I am not dying.).

As a Christian, I know that I am alive in Christ forevermore even when I face death. It will be different because it will be in the Presence of the Holy One who can not abide with sin. It will be glorious and like nothing that I have ever imagined.

Living out my life here on earth until the last great adventure.

EACH DAY

The other day on the phone with a really good friend of mine she said something in passing that hit me between the eyes because I had just written it also in passing, "living one day at a time is probably the best way to live." The thought occurred to me that it isn't just some plans I want in the works perhaps it is just control that I want. Part of the adventure of life is seeing how the plan unfolds.

At the same time there is nothing wrong with making plans and goals, writing them down and looking to execute them. There has to be a willingness to be flexible because life has a habit of altering our plans. So, when I got off the phone I suddenly felt hopeful, that it was OK to want to have plans but in fact it is really important to live and stay in the day.

I head into the new year with goals, hope and a renewed fervor for the day.

Thanks GML.

Another day is done

...and another year comes to a close. Most of my life I have enjoyed living one day at a time and in many respects it is the best and the only way to live. However, I am wanting to look at the long term calendar in terms of 2009 and the next 2 to 4 years.
In one particular area, I am having a hard time because I am ready to settle down somewhere and it seems that all of 2008 has been a transition time and we still have not transition to anything with the exception of Dan leaving traveling and taking a more permanent position at UMass Hospital. (some may be saying, well doesn't that settle it?) Not really, we are still in the decision making process.

Early this morning I put Grace on a plane and she will be gone for most of January. We will miss her.

On this day in 1865 - The coffee percolator was patented by James H. Mason. Thanks Mr. Mason.

1982 - The Man of the Year in "TIME" magazine was a computer. It was the first time a non-human received the honors.

(above was from On this day)



Hurting and healing
pain and joy
death and life

Relationships matter.

It is finally here and I have 3 teenagers who are pretty excited about it. You can see the delight in our girls in this picture one twirling, Grace and the other, Katie behind the lens which was specially wrapped for the occasion. This is at the beginning of the storm yesterday afternoon and this morning there is about 1 foot (almost a third of a meter). If you keep your eye or ear on the weather nation wide, there are a number of wintry wonderlands around the country.

I too am enjoying the snow. Our second winter back in the Northeast.

Now onto exploring and discovering new things about the Christ Child who was born to die. Let us not forget His purpose.

A quick glance back at 2008
(any typos, in correct grammar and the like, I ask you my kind readers to overlook ;-)

It has been sometime since I posted a newzie type update on our family. Where to begin? As I have posted here on my blog, we are now in our third MA residence and it is quite possible that we may look for a more permanent residence here.
Dan and the Red Sox had an end of the season loss, the Red Sox a game and Dan breaking his foot. He has been out of work since that time. Thankfully, the Lord has provided generously through dear ones including Dan's brother Billy who has had Dan and Michael working at his store. Dan is being hired as an RN at UMass Worcester as a hospital employee and I suppose that means that we have officially stopped traveling for now. He is also sporting a new look.

[So if we were in a holding pattern before now we are on the ground in the plane and we are not allowed to disembark.]

For me: It has been a year of a lot of travel with Katie and Michael and aside from hitting two deer at once with my new vehicle, our adventures were quite enjoyable and I am so grateful to have had the opportunity. To have the respect and admiration of my children who are young adults is something I treasure. It is also the year of dreaming of flying lessons and looking for a nest to land in. If you read through this blog you will find some more of my musings. I also wrote my way to a NanoWrimo win, that is I wrote a 50,000 word novel in the month of November.

"Love is the great apologetic." I have heard Grace quote and agree with this statement from Francis Schaeffer. Grace is a lover of life and learning and most of all a lover of people. It has been my great pleasure to continue to be taught the things of God through my children. I told her the other day that it is my delight to watch her bloom in the beautiful young woman that she is becoming. Grace's continued involvement with speaking and teaching bring her and her audiences and students delight. In 2008 Grace spent a total of five months in the Netherlands at Dutch L'abri as a student and a helper. (I could write at least a couple of blog posts just about that) All of her college apps are in and she has been accepted to one and waiting on the rest. Here is a thought on faith from something Grace wrote:

Faith is an honest recognition of the fact that we are limited human beings who must rely on our perception, imagination, and reason to understand reality. We call our understanding 'having faith' in x, y, z...because we recognize our epistemological incapacity to know the answers to the great questions of the universe beyond a shadow of a doubt.

Katie dear is constantly shooting people with her camera of course.

She rarely goes anywhere without it and she doesn't just shoot people.

Katie enjoys friendships around the world. In fact today she is visiting one today in Boston who is here via Hong Kong.

The biggest plus of qualifying for Nationals (Championship for speech and debate) was getting to see her friends from Sea to Shining Sea in the fine city of Birmingham.
Then there is our patriot and defender of Liberty, Michael who has taken greater interest in government and politics. This is Michael's third year debating and someone even called us a debating family (that's debatable). He is a young man who wants to get to the bottom of things and wants justice. Just this past weekend he was in a position where he needed to think through some arguments, it was a great time of being stretched.
This past summer Michael took the month of August to write a 50,000 word novel and then wrote another again in November. This is the boy who use to be allergic to pencil but was always enraptured by a good story. Michael is pretty passionate about music, listening to it every chance he can get and also looking forward to some music lessons soon. He too enjoys friends from all over.
Our year of transition which will continue into the new year has been a part of our refining process. May each of you look to the new year with hope.

BY FORCE

Matthew 11;11-13
"Truly I say to you, among those born of women there has not arisen anyone greater than John the Baptist! Yet the one who is least in the kingdom of heaven is greater than he.



pictured: Demon Hunter

12"^(L)From the days of John the Baptist until now the kingdom of heaven suffers violence, and violent men take it by force.

13"For all the prophets and the Law prophesied until John.

I have been pondering this phrase and I am still not sure what to make of it.

Here is the cross reference from Luke 16;16

The Law and the Prophets were proclaimed until John; since that time the gospel of the kingdom of God has been preached, and everyone is forcing his way into it.

I just read over in Luke chapter 3 because the verse above says that the Law and the Prophets were proclaimed until John. So what was John preaching: I believe the gospel of the kingdom of God. [ And for the very first time, since I picked up the Bible as a believer, I can see where the Fire and Brimstone preachers get there heat. Again I digress] In this account in the gospel of Luke, John is telling the people to repent and be baptized for the forgiveness of sins, but for those who are portrayed as truly repentant that is not enough for them. Luke just gives a small sampling of people saying what should I do and in conjunction with who is doing the asking John get specific but each answer can be summed up in "Love your neighbor."

The other thing that is evident laid right along side with repentance and love is justice. In the kingdom realm, there will be absolute love and absolute justice and that conversation is for another time. Although, I am sure that you can find blogs and websites out there that deal solely with those 2 issues. (for example: Fire and Ice)

"Violent men take it by force" and "everyone is forcing his way into it," the visual that I get on this is a FBI SWAT team or an army coming in on the ground fully armed and taking a village by storm. I don't think that is what we have here. It may be a safety in numbers kind of thing, going outside of the Jewish religious norm to hear this wild guy in the wilderness preach as opposed to the synagogue or temple to hear those dressed in fine clothes and are properly educated. Or perhaps it is more like, no one can stop me, there is something this guy John has to offer and nothing and no one will get in my way.

Did you ever think on these couple of verses?

Has the Word of God hit you between the eyes looking for your attention?

Do you know that this book is not just words on pages but living and active?

Today, in a sea of American Churches people are looking for the real thing, the kingdom of God, not rules, not programs, not an outstanding leadership staff. I believe in seekers, those who have already made a profession of faith in Jesus Christ, they are the seekers, looking for Jesus in the presence of those who call themselves His People. We know that the kingdom of God is here, it is not some far off distant place where we go when we die. It is here.